...To Assholes Everywhere...
Ya know, almost everyone I know dealt with a real mf'er of an asshole this weekend. So this one's for all you twaintholes out there.
Dear Assholes Of Every Shape, Size & Severity,
You are starting to overstay your welcome. And by "overstay your welcome", I mean I am this close to considering a one-woman vengeance spree. Knock it the fahk off, yo. No one wants to hear your lies, or you run someone's name through the mud because you're too fahking ignorant to figure out the truth. No one wants to watch you make some nice person cry. No one wants to watch you spit your political ignorance and potty mouth all over the place in such a way that you alienate your own friends. And not one single muthafuckah on the planet wants to watch you act like a big-mouthed bully. I'll repeat: Knock it the fahk off, yo.
P.S. And I feel like that for every girl who breaks a genuine nice guy's heart, me and the Sistahood should get to take turns punching you in the twat. I mean really. Quit doin that.