At a loss and being down....

The loss is a good one... I got on the scale and was down 2.2 lbs!

**JUDGE THIS: I try to be a good person, but sometimes depression gets in the way. It's hard to be there for everyone when you can't always be there for yourself.**

This was me today. I couldn't deal with going to work. The stress would have been just too much for me today.  While I was not at work, I applied for 6 jobs in the area. Lets see if anyone contacts me back.

The only perks of my job is the extra money I make when my sales are high. Also the close friends I have in Marjie and Lynn. (Lynn and I are closer) I think 6 years of being pushed and pressured and told you have to do this or else... has kinda gotten to me. Also the miserable pissy assholes we sometimes get on the phone. Yes I used a swear word, won't happen again. The pressure and stress can be overwhelming, of course what do you expect for customer service huh? The company has grown so much in 6 years, it's astronomical. We have had a few people leave/quit or go to part time due to this very problem.

I am sick of being at the mercy of the phone, it rings once and I have no choice but to answer as it auto picks up in my ear. Also, all the mistakes the people in the warehouse make, the Fed Ex people not being careful with boxes and breaking them, trying to cover their mistakes and still delivering to our customers astounds me. I am sick of having to call people to follow up on first orders, the shipping errors and Fed Ex's mess ups. I have had more than enough co-workers who don't do their jobs and I am there picking up their messes with the reports I have to do. When I send them emails or note about it I get no response and/or they don't do anything about it and they are still on the reports day after day. There are repeat offenders... always the same people!!! Why aren't they fired yet???

People wonder why I having so much stress, pressure and feel like I am just another face in the crowd. I am stuck in customer service FOREVER. Apparently my boss and her bosses think I do such a great job they want me to stay. Having this problem is a good thing she says... "Really?" It may be good for her but it's really really bad for my sanity. They truly have NO IDEA how I feel.

I love my boss, Kat is the best. But I don't know how much longer I can stand all of this other crap going on. I don't think the "higher ups" realize how much we do in customer service.... or even if you can appreciate it. They don't live it day after day after day. *sigh*

Good night all, I hope tomorrow looks a little brighter.